The Olympian

So now that the Olympics are over, we can go back to forgetting all about those people we got to know for two-plus weeks until 2014. I'm always surprised how I get pulled into sporting events and games that I completely ignore for 4 years, save those 2 weeks they get high profile during Olympics. During these times we get an in depth, up close look at the athletes' lives and training for this one, special time. We're told that they've trained their whole lives for this chance at Olympic glory, to live forever in our hearts and minds and in the record books. They of course, have other competitions that they earn their living at, but this is the Olympics.

We root for people we've never heard of because they wear our flag on their back. We root against people we've never heard of because we don't like what the president/dictator/military of their homeland did in the past. Strangely, we're really only rooting for the place we were born, through no decision of our own, and we're forever rooted there. In each competition there's a winner who gets to climb the podium and hear his or her national anthem. The glory of victory lasts forever.

Right?

Who was the men's polevault winner in 2000? Can't remember? Maybe you need something more recent and prominent. Who won the women's figure skating gold in 2006? Google it and you'll know, but is that glory? I say no. Sports glory lasts as long as the national anthem of the winner. Maybe even as long as the offseason. Short lived for sure.

There is a kind of glory that lasts for much longer. You could say it is truly a lasting glory that Olympians strive for, but slips through their hands like sand. The Olympian is God, and his glory has no end. His victory is over the power of Hell, and he stands atop the podium to hear his anthem. "He doesn't have an anthem" you might say, but surely he does. It goes like this "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come" and continues "You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being." (Revelation 4) But the anthem doesn't end, and it's not a recording that repeats. The anthem is sung by the creatures God himself created, and they sing it not because they are forced or coerced, they do it because they feel compelled to and have no other way to express their feelings. God never tires of this expression, and neither does his creation.

God is The Olympian who receives the eternal glory that athletes strive for.

Time goes on....

Enjoy the pics of our two darling boys!! We know that we are so blessed! I also wrote a "novel" about each of the boys after the pictures just so I would remember this stage of their lives. If you care to read, then enjoy that too. :)

Wild Graham!!

Rowan LOVES his brother!

Silly boy.....

SMILES!!

Graham concentrating while coloring......of course it's blue. :)

Rowan sitting up like a "big boy" in his Bumbo seat.

Hugging a snowman.

Bundled up for the snow!

Daddy and Ro-Dawg



This one is my favorite!!

So I wanted to write a little bit about the boys in the stage they are in so I won't forget. Time just keeps ticking.....I can't seem to figure out how to keep up with this thing called "blog". Anyway.....

Graham is in the hardest stage so far to parent. We're in full-on parenting mode with him. You know, the "Oh-my-gosh-am-I-going-to-screw-this-kid-up-for-life-or-have-I-already?" mode. You know, that one! At the same time, there are so many things that are so amazing about him. Yes, he's VERY strong-willed, and sometimes rude, and takes EVERYTHING apart, and gets into trouble, but those are also the things that are so great about him (except for the rude part). While it drives me crazy, I know one day we are going to look back and laugh at how many times he took the lamps apart, and how we had to remove several things from his room because he would disassemble them and hide the pieces. Or how he would take the dominoes and playing cards and dice and magnetic letters and any little parts of some game and put them all into one special place (usually so special we don't find it until the boys are asleep and we're cleaning up after the day). When I find them, I always smile....he loves the parts of things. :) I also love our conversations (when he will actually sit down and talk). This usually happens in the car on the way to go somewhere. I have heard him ask God if He will make it rain while driving along in the back seat. (This is a frequent prayer, along with "God can you get my hiccups away") We also talk about the tractors, or clouds, or the blue cars (he loves blue like he loves Mommy or Daddy or Brown Doggie), or the buildings, etc. The conversation usually goes something like, "Mommy, is that tractor working today?" "No" "Why is it not working today?" "Some days they don't work." "But I want the tractor to work today!" "Well, Graham, you can't make all the decisions." "Yes I can." Some day he'll get it. Oh Graham, my first born, my sweet, sweet Graham. Mommy and Daddy love you so much and want you to become the wonderful person that you are. God help us to let him go a little at a time. I pray that he would see his need for You at a very early age.

Our little Rowan baby, as we call him, is so sweet. He truly is our sunshine. Every morning when I go in to get him up, he looks up at me and smiles and gets so excited as if to say, "This is the best day ever!!" Everything is the "best thing" to him. Everything is "funny"!! He is rolling all around the floor and often ends up near the entertainment center where he will pat the glass with his hands or try to get the CD cases out. He is starting to discover the difference between his toys and brother's toys....and I think he quite prefers brother's toys. Which is fine, except in cases when there are small pieces; of course he doesn't understand this. He is starting to tell us when he is unhappy about something. Eric gave him a bath the other night and he grunted and groaned when he got him out because he wanted to keep splashing. Speaking of baths....forget having him lay down in the tub....he wants to roll right over and begin the splashing!! He tries to "grab" the water in his hand, but when that doesn't work, he just pats it. He "talks" to us often, also. I love his little "bababababa's" and "dadadadada's" and when he's really upset it's "mamamama!!" in a very sad voice. Rowan is happy most all the time, but just like any other baby, he has his moments. When he gets sad, it's a "break-your-heart" face and cry! One of these days I really do need to capture this face on camera. It's pretty classic. Our prayer for Rowan is that he would try, try, and try again. There may be things that are difficult for him, but we pray that he would have the motivation to keep getting better. More than all of that, though, we pray that Rowan would learn to love God and His Word and that the people around him would be blessed by his sweet spirit because of his love for God. We also pray that Rowan's "story" would cause others to praise our marvelous Creator who has given this little boy life!!

Rowan's first bites of food

We gave Rowan his first taste of rice cereal tonight, and he liked it!

Graham's Halloween costume:

Graham excited about his new jammies:

The boys enjoying a warm bath:

Family Picture

By request:

Post Surgery

Ok, it's been 3 weeks since Rowan's surgery so I thought I should recap now or never do it.

The weeks and days leading up to the surgery got heavier for us as the time approached. Graham could sense that mama and daddy were not quite the same and he acted a little differently because of it. He was a little more clingy than normal and so were we. Anytime you do heart surgery there is a chance of mortality, and I think that both of us were focusing on that chance more than anything. The last numbers I had seen were somewhere in the 3-4% range, which doesn't seem high until you consider that Rowan was a 1 in 1400 baby with DS. So numbers aren't exactly comforting to us, no matter how small. The week before the surgery we decided to take family photos. Natalie and I both knew why we wanted the photos, it was in case Rowan didn't make it. We didn't have to say it out loud; we knew. After taking the photos there was a little bit of relief for both of us, not sure why.

The day before the surgery we did pretesting at the hospital to make sure he wasn't getting sick. They had to draw blood and couldn't find a vein in his arm, so they had to use a vein in his head. Not a good sign. He was fine and we got ready for surgery the next day. We got to the hospital at 8AM to get checked in for a 10AM surgery. We ended up running into the sister of a friend from high school there. Her daughter was having heart surgery that day, but a different type. It was a nice distraction from sitting and waiting.We didn't get called for surgery until 1130AM. That was hard to sit and wait and think about what was going to happen. Plus Rowan hadn't eaten since 5AM and was getting hungry, but he just grunted like he was toughing it out. Good sign.

The long walk to the operating room was tough, as we were mentally preparing to drop off our son into the hands of a stranger to cut him open and fix his heart. It didn't help that the gal who "helped" us get to the OR took us to the wrong cardiothoracic OR. They have one just for the kids, she took us to the adult side. On the wrong floor. In the wrong wing. Not very comforting at all. We finally got to the right place and handed Rowan over. This moment was the hardest of all. I can't really explain it, except to say that I had a thought that this might be the last time I held him. I wanted him to be healed, but I was worried of the possibility of mortality. I think Natalie had some of the same thoughts. The funny thing was, as soon as the OR doors closed we were fine. It was out of our hands at that point (it always was, but I think it truly hit us at that moment) and we were at peace. We moved our stuff into the recovery room and took a little nap.

We got news at 230PM that they had just made the first incision at 130PM. We were surprised because they told us that it would only take 30 minutes to prep him. They couldn't get an IV in the kid anywhere, it took 2 hours. The poor kid came out looking like a voodoo doll. We decided to get dinner since he would be late getting out of surgery. It felt odd to leave our son in the hospital having surgery and go eat. We made quick work of dinner and got back ASAP. In the parking garage Natalie's phone rang and they said he would be in the room in 30 minutes. We were so overjoyed. I let out a Whoooohoooo in the garage and startled some people. Who cares. We were on cloud 9 that our boy made it!

We waited in the waiting room while they got him settled, IV tree put together and all the monitors setup. When we saw him for the first time what struck me was that it was going to be a tough road of recovery. I felt like I had been studying for a test, and when I got there the topic had changed and I studied for the wrong thing. I studied for the surgery instead of the recovery. It turns out that I didn't matter. Duh! Rowan was a stud and recovered so quickly that he was out of there in 6 days, when they told us to be prepared for 10-14! He's practically back to normal already and was rolling over, albeit gingerly and he wasn't thrilled once he got on his tummy, just as soon as we got him home. We still have an area of the living room fenced off from his brother so he doesn't get smashed on accident, but Rowan has exceeded our expectations so far.

I hope I didn't bore you with this long essay, but I thought it might be interesting to see my thoughts and emotions during this time. If it wasn't, hopefully you skimmed and will enjoy the pictures.

-E

Immediately after surgery

3 days after surgery

Discharge. This was almost as exciting as leaving with a newborn.

Little Chest

This little chest will be much different the next time you see it. On the outside it will have a long scar from top to bottom. Inside it will have a fully repaired heart that pumps blood efficiently around the body, to those wiggly legs and arms. The heart will last this boy a long lifetime and will surely be filled with love from family, friends and His Lord.

These last few days have been very tough for us, and I'm sure that the next few will be just as difficult. I cannot express deeply enough the love and concern we have felt from our family and friends. I won't mention what you have done for us, but you know. Thank you all again.

We have been holding fast to our Lord in this time, but it is good to recall the specific things He has said to us:
"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."
"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
"O my Comforter in sorrow, my heart is faint within me."
"He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay."

We know that we will not display complete faith during this time, as we have already been anxious, but we feel His presence comforting us. His sovereignty over this situation and intimate knowledge of our feelings certainly is a pillar of strength to us. And of course, we always have this promise "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." This will ultimately work for our good, in His kingdom's favor. We praise the Lord in our time of discomfort.

I am So Thankful....

I know God brings people into our lives for very specific reasons. With some relationships we may never know what that is or how exactly we have impacted each other's lives. For others, it is crystal clear. I began tutoring a girl in math a couple weeks ago, and before we began working together her mom wanted to come by to meet me. In a brief conversation over the phone, I learned that she had just recently lost her third child. He lived for just an hour after birth. She came by to meet me, and I almost felt bad that Rowan was in the room with us. Her son would have been just about Rowan's age. Shortly after that, I began to tutor her oldest child in their home. It didn't take long to find out more of the details of their story as they were very willing to share. Their son had a fatal condition, and they knew before he came that he would not survive. He lived for an hour......and they will tell you they are so thankful! They didn't even think he would be alive when he was born. Every week I am over there, I am reminded of how blessed we are. I almost feel ashamed of any sad feelings I have had about Rowan having Down Syndrome, or any feelings of being "left out" because we now have a child with special needs. I know these are probably very normal emotions and that there's not necessarily anything wrong about feeling them, but God brought this family into my life so that I could see the tremendous blessings we have! I knew this before, but now these blessings seem to shine brighter. Rowan has been given LIFE!! And he has brought such JOY to our family. We had no idea what our lives would be like after he was born. We didn't know how serious his heart condition would be, when he would have to have surgery, etc. Look at him now.....doing SO well. Gaining weight well, only on one heart medication, cooing, smiling, laughing, kicking, lifting his head up, moving, focusing on toys.......WOW. And all of these things because God has chosen to give Rowan life and allow him to flourish!! God, we are SO thankful!! Our two beautiful boys You have chosen for us to raise.....for this we are truly thankful!

Here are some pictures to enjoy. And would you please pray for Rowan's surgery on September 2? We are asking God to give Rowan a long, full and healthy life. Will you pray with us?

Our sweet Rowan baby

smiling at Mama....

What a sweet face!

Scooter boy!

Watching the rain.

Awwwww.....

Graham's tattoo....he asks Daddy for these regularly now. :)

The Brothers

And this is how it all started, just the two of us.....I love you honey.

You are my true love and a wonderful Daddy!!